I'm lurking in the back of the gilded theatre. Surrounded by drunk techno-wannabes and some truly innovative engineer-future-hacker-developers. I'm irritated at the 20 something asian chick playing the black guy and the indian guy off each other. The art on the screen reminds me a long lost "friend" - and the status of his projects - awareness smacking. It pulled me out of one of my existentialist crisis a decade ago. But not today. In that decade I've traveled down the caverns in Brazil into the sacred city of the Euboise, fought Innana and the Piper at the Gates of Dawn, lost my golden fleece and retreated to the city of Angeles to strategize archetype creation.
I hate crowds. Large groups of anonymous. Faces forward to the spotlight. I'm trying to enjoy myself, but failing. I feel like my time would have been better spent working on my forecasts at home. But then I remember I have friends here. It's just the stage takes the spotlight. I never liked art in museums. I preferred them in the grungy artists studios, painting stacked against the wall.
I like individuals. The people. You meet. That's why I'm here. To eat at a different table. To expose myself. To bullshytte like that coquettish asian chick. To remember the world is more than that I create in my mind. That the future is not up to me.
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I'm turning over rocks. I'm rolling thought experiments on the backburner. I've recently had a break-though.The trend: the world is flat, the earth is the center of the solar system (universe). Those are concepts that were well believed - before science proved them incorrect. I've been looking for these incorrect current beliefs/understandings all my life. I love thinking about what we believe in today - the truth so hidden - but will be so obviously false and untrue in the unveiling. I found one of those the other day. It's revolutionary and radical and yet, I can look back and see the pathway glimmers. The outer edges of the concept. It has to do with view, perception, reality and the world.
The understanding and concepts of energy will have dramatic breakthroughs and shifts.
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I'm enjoying the cool air. The tobacco smells strange to me. I miss the smoke of cloves. The evening has passed. I'm speeded down the Hollywood freeway. And as angsty as I've been tonight I realize, I'm really happy with who I am. I am exactly what I want to be. And I wouldn't change places with anyone.
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