I'm listening to the Sisters of Mercy researching mercy. Coming from a legal family (4 generations in Law, including my grandfather who was a high level state Judge) it's surprising that I have and yet have not understood this concept. Law is about judgment - where is the mercy in that? And yet, a judge has the possibility of great mercy. In looking back, I can see where my legal family has been merciful - and also judgmental. It was very inconsistent (I'm not talking about any personal experience here) and you never knew when you would get the ax of judgment or the aura of mercy.
I resolved this issue by taking the "high" road on myself and creating the pressure to live up to my own hardest judgment. And to any possible judgment that any other could have of me. No one could judge me harder, than I.
I took this attitude to create the strongest chain mail, with not one chink, constantly re-strengthening the armor. The armor against any possible judgment. If no mercy for myself, why would I consider being merciful to anyone? And why would I be merciful to myself? Leave me to sharpen my ax, to practice target shooting. I know that's a hard line of thinking.
This morning I was pondering all this, and it occurred that teachers must be merciful to their students that make mistakes. In fact, many who teach must be merciful.
So how does one be/do mercy/iful? Is it like being impeccable? (In that it is difficult at best to explain and different for everyone.) Then, when do you know when to be Mr Tough Guy vs A Sister of Mercy? Does mercy exist where judgment doesn't? If there is nothing to judge, what is there to mercify? Who benefits more from the mercy? The bestower of the one bestowed? And where does the mercenary (a descriptor I have used for myself multiple times) fit into all this?
This is a tricky sublime meditation. And these are and not rhetorical questions.
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