heathervescent

Points Along a Line

These things, these beginnings we think we create. These edifices we think we have invented - are not our inventions. Something came before us. Something caused, created us. And it is the us that has created this thing. It is a beginning for us, we are but a vessel for these things, these ideas, to manifest. But we are not responsible - and yet utterly responsible for making it happen.

It takes a village to raise a child.
Everything in this world is because of the way the world is.
Nothing can be taken out of this world and looked at objectively. Objective is a different point of view.

But it is still a point along a line. In a matrix of many points on many lines. Mostly you are bound to which points on which lines. Sometimes though, you can move from a point or a line to another. But you must be willing to abandon everything that has brought you to the point/line from which you wish to move.

Some (geek) events coming up

What's on my calendar? The usual mix of tech and alt events in LA and beyond.

• Kirk is hosting the Nov Community Buildrs on Thursday. I've never been able to make one, although I like the concept and encouraged Kirk to start this up when we talked during the summer. I actually think I'm gonna leave this event alone, because I'm working on creating another new community that happens on Thursdays closer to my hood, and branching away from the geek/tech scene. I'm talking about Aikido. I get tired of being only in my brain, so I've been getting back into practicing aikido and helping get the local shusekai dojo going. I've got some plans for other body/movement classes I'm gonna organize in 2008.
• Irina is throwing the Winnies this Friday at CineSpace. I love the idea behind the event, so I'm going and might give or receive an award.
• Then Saturday night A+D wrangled me into doing a last minute BootieLA performance. Me and my posse will be performing alongside my fav DJs on stage starting just after midnight!
• Then I'm off to Mountain View for the Internet Identity Workshop until the 5th. Ask a Ninja is doing their live thing for the ask a ninja day. I don't think I'll make it to that.
• And then it's December. Santarchy in LA (on the 8th) and SF on the 15th. December Geek Dinner, tbd. Machine Project's Fry. Open Space Facilitation training back up in the East Bay and I'm trying to make it to NYC to see Neilalien, Joe, Dame Darcy, Steve and some other folks I am forgetting at the moment.
• Finally, it's back to Cambria to close out the year. 2007 - opened and closed.

Wow - 2007 - lots happened. Lots changed. Lots was accomplished. I didn't get my 40 days in the desert. But I was extremely successful at pimping and promoting - my main goal of this year. I already know what my main challenges for 2008 are. To get over myself and do these three things I hate doing. If I do those things, then my face will be on a cover (again) soon and I'll have jetted off on another trajectory - or more likely I'll be following several threads all at once. But before we go off on that ride, let's get through the rest of the year.

Texas and Cormic McCarthy

I just got back from seeing the Cohen's Bro new movie - No Country for Old Men. I always think the Cohen bro movies are different from what they turn out to be. I had no idea what this one was about, what story would it tell, what was the style. I knew nothing, my mind was zen blank as the lights dimmed and the screen came to life.

A story unfurled. Wide beautiful shots of desert scrubland. A desert I didn't recognize. It was Texas. Some scenes reminded me of my desert trips, minus the dead bloated bodies and drug deals gone awry. (I did once dream of that life, in a country on a border far far from North America.) As the story continued, wide shots, spare dialog, characters that were not Hollywood beautiful, perfect, but interesting and a delight to look at, to watch unfold. Who was this like? What was this like? Fellini came to mind.

Scenes took place. Guns and mayhem, and surprise and ingenuity. And then there were post action come across the scenes, which reminded me of the Bashar and the last 4 chapters in Book 5 of the Dune Series. (I remember you Bashar. I remember you from that summer in Des Moines, when I was 19 and had not yet read Hyperion and learned of the Shrike. You are not just the Bashar Teg, but inspiration for other characters in stories, myths that I love.)

Until the final credits this was just another movie, until, until, I saw it was based on a Cormac McCarthy novel. Then everything fell into place. I should have know. The movie perfectly caught the difficulty, challenge and utter sensual delight of a Cormac McC novel. They are hard, rough, bitter fruits - nuanced and faceted. I went home and picked pages to read aloud from Blood Meridian. I remembered the story. I remembered who gave it to me. (Alfonso, your other name.) And I remember what I learned from that time. The love of the desert and compete and utter ruthlessness.

Hawt! An n9593 on Ice

Andrew Maskin put an n93 on ice for the NYC mobile barcamp.

If you missed the MobileBarcampLA, check out the recap here. There's also a google group you can join. My favorite items were:

• One World. No Borders. 3 Billion Connected People. Claim Your Piece. - David Harper
  Dave Harper, CEO of Winksite, a suite of tools to immediately create and support mobile communities, gave an hour-long session sharing his experience on what it takes to scale mobile applications to 189+ countries and over 5 million hits per month. After providing tips and tricks on mobile advertising and mobile SEO, Dave showed and explained QR Codes and their real-world applications using a plethora of examples. People got really excited about this and again, ideas were bounced back and forth and were discussed far beyond the session.

• halfbaked.com - Entrepreneurial Improv - Alexis Rondeau
  Each team selected 2 random words and got 20 minutes to come up with - and pitch - the next mobile killer application! Besides having the very nice side-effect of making people play and interact, the resulting mobile startup ideas ranged from outrageous ("Zombie Hook-up") to VC-fundable ("Car Watch"). After every team presented their startups' product, revenue model, marketing plan, tagline and logo the most promising one was selected. The winning team was completely speechless when we gave each of them either an N95 or an N800. The unpacking of the boxes ensued immediately and everyone was flocking around the devices. In total we gave away 10 devices in this session (including the very cool panel of judges).

• MegaPhone Demo and discussion - Dan Albritton
  Dan Albritton from playmegaphone.com gave the first workshop in the morning showcasing their mobile real-time multiplayer game engine. MegaPhone is an interactive installation where any cellphone becomes a game-controller by placing a phonecall. Within 1 Minute Dan had the crowd punching their phone-keypads ("Peow-peow!P-p-p-eow!") to score and shouting into their mics ("Grabgrab! Grabgrabgrab! Grab!") to reach the Top 10 of the game. After an overview of the underlying technology and showcases, the group went into a long conversation on creating new applications of the project.
• (recap bullets written by Andy Maskin, Source)

And the In N Out Burger truck in the parking lot. And I don't even like In n Out. ;) I also enjoyed the 1-2am drive around Hollywood to Santa Monica, where we QR tagged In n Out on Sunset, saw a car go over the cliff on Mulholland, looked at the lights of the Valley and Basin from the hills and drove like a race car driver taking the freeway curves at an increasing speed utilizing centrifugal force with the top down.

Now that's a day in the life of LA.

Home Again, Home Again

Whew, it's good to be home. This past 10 day exile from the city of Angels was a hard one. Hard not because of the people and traveling (although those had their moments), but hard because I have turned into a hard-core SoCal Angelino. You know how you can recognize New Yorkers anywhere by their accent and NYC attitude? (I don't mean that in a negative way, you often know a NYer when you see em.) And the most hard core can't imagine living anywhere else? Well, if you apply it to heathervescent you'll need to swap out NYC for LA. I used to love traveling the world, seeing other cultures, play being a native when I was a tourist. I studied 5 languages because I wanted to communicate with anyone and understand culture from the insides. Now I don't care if I ever leave California. There is no other place in the world I would rather be (except maybe Brazil - actually naaahh.)

In the past year, as the LA geek scene has exploded, several different people have asked  me why I don't extend my event/activities to other cities. I certainly believe there are opportunities in other locals - tech scenes are exploding in "second" and "third" tier tech cities all over the world. I considered building a world empire for about 5 minutes and then I realized that was a boy-ego-mustkeepupwithNerd2point0geekscene thought. I don't care about building an empire across the world (at least not in the geek scene). And when I think about what I am passionate about - it's technology and Los Angeles. So although I pause and wonder if I am passing up a huge opportunity for some kind of "domination", I stay true to myself, my passions and my authenticity and stay focused on the city I love. The city that inspires me. The city that drives me crazy and fills me with possibilities. A city that only rivals NYC and Mexico City in the Northern Hemisphere and with world peers of Shanghai, Sao Paolo, Mumbai, Tokyo and Seoul. A city close enough to nature that I can disappear off the grid, deep into hardcore desert in 4 hours. Or if I have only 1 hour, I can drive to the top of a mountain and look out across the basin, shivering in snow depending on the month. I don't need to leave LA, because I have the whole world right here - and I'm living smack in the middle of it.

Who are you? Online?

If you're the least bit interested about how integrated identity is going to pan out online - I suggest you head to the Internet Identity Workshop - B in Mountain View the first week of December. Most of the conversation is about making identity platforms work with each other (like OpenID, Higgens, CardSpace, SAML, Liberty Alliance, etc, etc), but there are lots of other fascinating topics. I'm specifically interested on how people use identities online (well, I know how people use identities online) but how the technology facilitates or makes it difficult for people to have single or multiple identities online.

Unlike the real world (meatspace) there is no corporeal body to anchor you online (unless you create one). This online anchor is most often a website,sometimes a blog, and rarely incorporates the various personalities one has. So I'm going to watch, learn and think about this online anchor for your (and mine) online identities.

Reviewing the technology, gives me lots of ideas for fleshing out, using and extending your/mine/my clients online brands. I believe we are at the tip of the iceberg on this. And of course, I expect to find methods of enlightenment and self-actualization buried in the technology.

The Best of all Possible Worlds

I've taken a bit of a blogging hiatus. It wasn't planned, I just wasn't inspired to write much. I've been working on some things, reviewing others, trying out personas, roles, possibilities. And I've been traveling. I'm sitting in the Houston airport right now. It's been a rainy several days. I'm here celebrating the boyfriend's grandparents 65th wedding anniversary. The party was last night, and I have to say, I was excited to come and see his family again.

His grandmother, Fanny, told me a story from when they were first married, and Louie was an Army officer. She would follow him around in an old Packard. This was quite a feat because of the war gas rationing and she had to travel long distances. She didn't often have gas stamps for the gas. So she'd roll up, tell em she was the wife of an Army officer and she didn't have any gas stamps and they'd have to give the gas to her. She told me she was never refused. What really caught me about this story was her attitude when she started out - "I didn't think about how I would have to do it or how I couldn't do it. I just did it."

I found this attitude so refreshing. Especially in an 80+ year old great-grandmother.

It's an attitude that's important - that makes us alive. It's doing what we must, to have the life, to do the things, we most desire to do. It's living as if there is no other choice. A good friend of mine reminds me of a quote along this path:

"Aut viam inveniam aut faciam" (I will either find a way or make one.)

Which path do you make your way?

Nov G33k D1nner

Geek Dinner - Tomorrow night - (Tuesday)
8pm
El Coyote on Beverly
Special Guests
RSVP

Inspiration

Brian Johnson who started Zaadz a couple years ago is again working on his own site: ThinkArete. It's got some good stuff and big ideas.

1 Hour, a million miles away

One hour from Long Beach is a completely different world. Shrouded in fog, the city of Avalon. (Begin Brian Ferry soundtrack now.) I had heard about Catalina from friends, family and full of mystery from the map. The boyfriend and I were looking for an overnight trip different from our desert excursions - and he surprised me with Catalina.

We packed our bags, drove to Long Beach and caught the 1 hour ferry. It was a cool foggy day, and as we left port the Queen Mary was a ghostly reflection. Huge container transport trucks appeared from the fog. Flocks of black birds skimmed the oceantop in modified V formation. Two seats back a reality TV "star" and his camera crew attempted to wax poetic and failed. I was jacked up on surprise and Donald Trump.

As the island became visible I kept calling it Mysterious Island after one of my favorite childhood movies. S wondered if they had a movie theatre that only showed King Kong.

The place was practically empty. I guess that's what you get when you go off season during the week. I actually love going off-season. I hate being a tourist. I don't like crowds and I want to feel like what it is for the locals. :)

Avalon reminded me of a cross between the Caribbean Island towns and Ouro Preto, in Belo Horizonte Brazil. Little Golf carts everywhere. A completely walkable town. We stopped by the old time photo shop and had our photos taken. We wandered around the waterfront. We hung out on the balcony of our Victorian Hotel. We toured around the island. We went underwater. We learned about the history of Catalina. I breathed deeply the cool ocean air. I wore my sneakers and ski jacket.

As we came back to the mainland yesterday I felt like we had been gone for more than 24 hours. I felt completely refreshed, relaxed and reset. I felt like my adventurous, nothing can get in the way between me and my dream life. And I felt inspired and passionate to do the things I love doing.

Thanks magical isle, La Catalina - Avalon. 

On Making Experiences

I love to make experiences. Experiences for myself, and for other people. On Saturday I had a fine opportunity. After holding sessions on "how to kick ass" at barcamp, I ran off to meet friends at the Palms Thai in Hollywood and to catch Thai Elvis.

Now I have heard about this Thai Elvis dude for-ever, but after 3.5 years in LA (and living less than 10 min from) I still had not seen him. I expected a dark, velvet covered, smoky, dive bar vibe - and was totally confused when I entered and it was a cross between college cafe seating and midwest kitsch (wooden cats hanging from the recessed lighting). I was a deer in the headlights, but I found my crew. It was refreshing catching up with old friends.Then it was out to my favorite dance party with awesome DJs A+D. It was a friend's birthday and I was able to get us a VIP table. The whole evening was an awesome experience.

That reminded me how much I love being in a position to make awesome experiences for people. Experiences like the "failed" pillowfight, streetwars, barcamps2 & 3, zombies in LA and SF, material boys, birthday parties. That's one of the things I do. I know what will delight and excite people and then I work to make those experiences a reality.

Why should they only exist in the mind of movies? Especially here in Los Angeles.

Bonus credit participation: What experience will you create today?

Misc Links to check out

• Cliff Allen wrote a great recap of the Networking Session from StartupLA.
• This looks like an interesting site I want to check out more.
• And this is something I want to do.

Also I want to give Kudos to Joel Ordesky at Exectec. I've been lurking on his meetup for months and finally came out to meet the crew last night and had a great time. Lots of great feedback and conversation and I'm left with new ideas for re-positioning myself. Thanks everyone.

BarcampLA4 Preso

Here's the preso I gave at BarcampLA 4. It spans online branding, blowing shit up, doing things and how to get your heart's desire. As in all things, be authentic, manage risks strategically and be safe KICK ASS.

xxx

-Heather

ps. I'm a kick-ass integrator.

 

| View | Upload your own

ps. photo credits in the preso go to Kmo and Jenna.

My Golden Ticket

Sometimes I think back to my golden ticket. The life I sacrificed to have, to be the person I am today. I do not look back at that possibility wishing I could return to it. Or to relive it. I knew what I was doing when I cashed it in, took my golden ticket and got on this path. I knew in the future the full implications of the golden ticket would be revealed. In the present unfolding my golden ticket becomes stronger and the sacrifice to create the golden ticket more powerful.

Sometimes I get caught though. I'm human. I forget about the bigger picture, my bigger goals, my dreams I dare not tell anyone. The secret thoughts, solutions I remind myself in cypher through my writing, my metaphors often forgotten, lost to myself, until a specific moment. I get caught in the ebb and flow of this world. And then I remember my golden ticket: gold flecked with dreams of a lifetime and love forever.

When I remember it I am filled with joy and lightness. The radiance has not dampened. It reminds me that each day matters more than the previous and with this time, it's my duty, my responsibility to be the best I can and make the best that I think best.

Technology and conscious evolution

I've been having a conversation about technology and consciousness evolution on a mailing list I'm on. Someone had said that technology has not improved our lives. I had to categorically disagree with them, based on the concepts of the Progress Paradox. But then I started thinking about it. Beyond the day to day survival - has technology really improved our energy? As in, the energy we have to use at our disposal everyday? And the added energy we have, how are we using it? Technology uses a lot of energy today to participate in and maintain. And technology hasn't made us more efficient with our energy either. Sure it pretends to give us all this free time, by doing things for us, but many people spend the same or more time managing what's supposed to help them free up their time.

Anyway, I digress. The point in bringing up this topic on the blog is that I found an interesting book about technology and expanding consciousness in the infosphere called Digital Dharma. I'm intrigued and yet repelled. WTF? Matching up yoga chakras with levels of internet activity? I don't know. I like the concept, but from the excerpts, it's a bit out there - even for me.

Add a listing of LA Tech events to your blog or site

Want to keep in touch with the events happening in the LA tech scene? Then check out Option:LA - an online event calendar. If you're into Facebook Apps, here's the Option:LA facebook app. You can also add a widget display the upcoming events on your own blog or web site (grab the code here). It's easy, and free and you'll help build and participate in the LA Tech Community. It looks something like this:

Voting Day

San Francisco votes for a new mayor today. Like I have said before, following Chicken in this race has been inspiring. He's audaciously plucked his cubic centimeter of chance and run run run with it.

Today, the people of San Francisco will vote. I don’t know how many. I don’t know who they are gonna vote for, but something is gonna happen. When I decided to run it was because nothing was happening. And something has to happen. I hope that the something that happened was as fun for you as it was for me.

 

And who knows… maybe this is just the beginning…

Another dot on the line of life. Of possibilities explored. I wish I could join the party tonight at 12 Galaxies. But another me, a different heather, one who never left San Francisco is there playing her part, possibly not  even named heather - but she - or he - is being the me, who would be, there.

And there is another universe, where I am there, celebrating the win, and the end of the beginning and the beginning of something else. A Calixeco Muni. I have been there, have been that person, for others.

Please live it well. Savor the moment - it only happens once - but the taste can last eternity.

Heathervescent w/ can of whupass

Heather Vescent
Originally photographed by eecue.

Dave Bullock/eecue took an awesome shot of me with my favorite flammable. I had a good time at BarcampLA - I stayed a lot longer than I had planned, good sessions, saw lots of people. It was packed! I did a session on How to Kick Ass.

Teslacoil orchestra

This is really cool!

On another note, S brought a book for me to read called "Think Big and Kick Ass in business and life" by Donald Trump and Bill Zanker. I laughed, but I'll read it.

BarcampLA Calls

Another weekend of tech craziness. LA is smack in the middle of it's geek event explosion. I've got mixed feelings about all the events.

On one hand, it is awesome to see the popularity, the success, the desire and thirsting for this tech connectivity. On the other hand, my biggest concern, my biggest fear is too many tech events are happening with participants spread thin. Back on the other hand, I'm excited and delighted that so many leaders are taking the torch. On the other hand, how do I know they are looking out for the community? On the other hand why is it up to me to decide what's good for the community? It's not. I just had the vision last year and have been carrying the torch. The diversity and different methods, attitudes, goals and people make for a diverse vibrant community that serves the community. That's all good.

But I've worked so hard, for what feels like often nothing, to get here. To this place where these events are even happening - I'm not the only one carrying the torch. I don't want them to be flash in the pans. I want them to be successful, sustainable - for each organizer/leader and the community. But for them to be sustainable, they must each hold on their own, and within the community. And I'd like to hope that all events contribute the building and visibility of the LA tech community.

Why do I even care? A couple years ago I only wanted to blow shit up, express myself and make my life the most awesome thing in the world. What's the difference now? (Maybe I've blown enough stuff up, expressed myself enough and have a dream life - and teach you too how to have a dream life.)

Because I see the need, and I have a bigger vision.

But let's get beyond the big vision and talk about today. I'm thinking about chucking my online branding with bonus enlightenment preso, for a guide on blowing things up in a fire or do-ocracy or how to get your heart's desire. Which is more interesting? Or should I cram all 4 into 1 sessions called the heathervescent show?

Edges

"An edge means there is something beyond it"
"A end means there is something beyond it."

A beginning and an end are container points.  Differentiating, clarity, probing creates the dividing lines. What's in the container?

Ruthless with a Baby

The morning began early, with a dream of snakes. In my dream they were attacking me. Biting my hands over and over, not getting a grip, yet not going away. I was irritated at the terror, yet stayed calm as the biting continued. Was it a metaphor for aikido class last night?

I was practicing with a new student that was like a pillar of stone. Such strength, no fluidity. Practically impossible to move him. We were practicing an entering/irimi that made my stomach turn. Honestly, I wanted to puke, and that with the pillar of stone made for a very trying practice. However, I persevered in my fluidity. In my probing. In practicing the technique poorly. I laughed at the iron grip (which I easily flicked out of) and found how to take his balance away. I kept calm and relaxed, even in my irritation. In the end, it was a joy.

At the end of class we practiced koku-dosa. It's one of my favorite techniques. You kneel with you hand outstreached. One person offers their hands/arms and the other receives holding/pushing back on the offer. On the surface it looks like you are pushing the other person over. But it's more subtle than that. A feeling you cultivate is one of groundedness, the other person is trying to find your tension points. As my partner offered, I placed my hands on his arms. I could feel the tensions in his arms, I could feel him probing my tension spots, finding them, but  I hid them with my grounded thoughts. Becoming more aware of them as he found them and then relaxing them. And over everything, I kept the feeling of hugging him. Of having abstract affection for this being in front of me.

After class we talked about ruthlessness. My sensai last knew me when I was extremely ruthless. Since then, I have gone on to explore other terms. It's time now to return to ruthlessness, with a slight tweak: Ruthless with a baby.

And here's another hint from last night:
When you're about to give in, is exactly when you are about to break through.

I've seen that happen with others and me many times. It gives me hope when I feel like giving in/up (which has been much recently). But that's ruthlessness for you. Give up, giving up.

And to bring it back full circle, when I checked on the snakes this morning after I woke from the dream, they needed water. As much as I fear them, and wish they would go away (they are big and have been trouble to take care of recently) I want them to have the best life possible. I will take care of them. I filled their water bowl and turned up the heat. I want them to have a good life.

She's Geeky Session: On Do-ocracy

I lead a session on do-ocracy at She's Geeky last week. Denise Gearty was kind enough to take notes during the session and here they are - to hopefully inspire you to do things. Do-ocracy is a tricky thing - but you just have to go in and do it. :)

Did you miss the conference? There are tons of awesome notes here.

 

_____________________________________

Do-ocracy Session // Tuesday, October 23, 2007 // 10:30 AM

Do-ocracy (definition on board)

Do-ocracy is a summary term for consensus management on a non-authoritarian, classical anarchist model emphasizing voluntary involvement and actual results, where those with an actual involvement make the decisions.

GTD = Getting Things Done (www.davidco.com)

How to Get Your Hearts Desire, a six step process outlined

Heather found Do-ocracy based on experience in mostly volunteer environments (e.g. large Burning Man camps www.burningman.com). From here she developed experience and transitioned to the LA tech community.

Key learning:  solicit/ask for help from trusted friends and colleagues 

Question: What if you are not clear on your vision?  How do you check this? How do you know?

• Need confidence in yourself
• Don’t always be a perfection tied down by details
• Allow yourself failure every once in awhile

 
How do you start the community?  -- Ignite action?

• Start with something small (a small vision) even something material and practice
• Don’t forget to be direct and ask for help, feedback, etc.
• Sometimes you just have to ask
• Consult with your friends
• Know feedback verses criticism

Find a Space to Stretch In -- find it, encourage it. A safe space to practice do-ocracy.

Creativity allows the development of ideas and enables action

Julia comments that Australia and New Zealand follow do-ocracy in the workplace. It must be a cultural phenomenon. From her experience it fostered honesty and a successful project

Ryanne (video blogging)does large scale events/video blogging practiced do-ocracy

Heathervescent comments on her same experiences.  She recommends that you have to be aware of others who want to step in and take over responsibilities.  By engaging others you open up growth and opportunity.

Cultivating Leaders: Pay attention and take note of others to get involved.  Sometimes you have to ask people to play certain roles.

Heather Newman "There is no fucking book!"  ~ Comment on where are the guidelines or rules?…where are the mentors that direct me?

You need consensus when working in teams; so, you have to communicate to get things done . . . to move forward.

Partner with people who compliment you, may be opposite of you  -- they can make you shine

There is a difference between "what you are good at" and "what your strengths are" -- Know this!

References:

Book: Strength Finders

Site: Positive Psychology - there is a test on the site

Book: The War of Art by Stephen Pressfield

Reference: Steve Pavlina's Personal Development for Smart People

What about when Do-ocracy goes wrong?

• You end up doing it all yourself
• Volunteers that are hurting (process, team, decision-making, etc). Sometimes you have to "fire" volunteers
• People don’t communicate and/or holding resentment can poison the success overall
• Be aware so that you can catch this early in the game
• One approach is to categorize late resentment comments as "data invalid"  -- they should be presented at a relevant point when action can be taken

If you want something, put it out to the universe but as specifically as possible

What about commitment?

Are you hearing the advice given?  Are you at a point where you are capable of hearing the advice? This is key.