heathervescent

kick your own ass

Get your own "kick ass" shirt at the Superviva Store.

Or better yet, create your own life list at Superviva! You can see mine in the right column of this blog (RSS feed!)

Superviva is a new site where you can create a list of the things you want to do in your life. You know, like goals. It's easy to add goals, look at other people's lists and get ideas. Then you do them and check them off your list.

I've been addicted to it since I started playing with it in it's early phases. It's fun and inspiring to write down my goals and see them all in a list. And then look at the list of everything I've done. It makes me feel like I've really accomplished something.

I'm going to write more about it, because I think it is really a great site - and because of it, I'm no longer doing my yearly goals - I've moved all my goals to Superviva.

Come on, join me in Kicking Ass in 2006! I dare you!

kicking into turbo

The thing about a turbo, is that it doesn't kick in, until you need it. It's there, waiting, heating up next to the engine, waiting for the go (or the right RPM).

I've been purring around town mostly in my low gears. Cruising/stalking Hollywood. A few fits and starts of speed, acceleration on Sunset or San Fernando. But nothing like the wide open road - a long pavement kiss with my tires, clutch foot resting on the seat beside my leg.

That's about to change. The RPMs of my life are finally revving high enough for my turbo to kick in. And it's about time. I enjoy kicking around town and stalking, watching, observing, learning; but I really love accelerated time. The best of Heather comes out in these hyper accelerated times.

Like, yesterday, when I had 15 minutes to get from the Fashion District to Century City for an appointment. Logic dictated that there was no way I could make it. I gave myself 5 minutes on the 10 before I'd call and push back. In 5 minutes I was getting off at La Cienga! I swear I wasn't speeding insanely or "threading the needle". I just let it flow. The wind in my hair, my hands on the wheel, enjoying the speed, the sound of my wheels on the road.

The big block has been refitted for taking on jet fuel, it's been QA tested, test driven, final adjustments and it's about to come out of the garage. I can feel the engine straining in the mounts and the yearning for the open road. It's only a few more days.

The Baja 2

Sam did a great write up of our recent trip to Baja, which we call, The Baja 2.  Check out the story, pictures and video.

You can check out my video of traveling on the bumpy baja roads.

We had a great time, the truck is in the shop getting cleaned up and we're ready to head back down!

2005 - the door is closing

Much of what I write about in this blog and how I try to live my life is about dream actualization. Figuring out what kind of life I want to have and then making it happen. I focus on self-awareness and learning, no matter how difficult each situation may be. For many years, I've kept a yearly goal list. Since 2005 is winding down I'm preparing to close it out. And this year, of all previous years, has been the most amazing life actualization. In closing out 2005, I'm closing out my yearly goal list and using something new - which will be unveiled to you, my dear readers, very soon.

If I could use two words to describe 2005, it would be: test-drive. Test drive following my gut, test driving starting a company, test drive romantic relationships, test driving a big truck. I'm in the process of trading those test drives for the real thing. A real company, a real truck, a real relationship - all while listening to that voice inside me that pushes me to jump off the cliff and fly into the blue sky.

I like this

"I like knowing that, despite the freeway possessing exits I might never take, winding through neighborhoods through I which I might never see, busily allowing thoroughfare for commuters I might never know, despite the freeway giving me access, that I will always have my trusted routes. I know I can sit in the cabin of my car, that as long as I maintain a connection to that central vein, that I will always find a way to welcome, loving and inviting arms."
- from liquid etchings

Taking money out of the equation

If money was not an issue, what kind of life would you lead?

Don't think about this question as if you had an unlimited supply of money, instead, think about this question as if money didn't even factor into the equation.

Would you live your life differently? How?

back to life

The last goal of 2005 was squeaked in last week - a Baja offroading adventure in Mexico.

Trip write up with pictures coming soon, highlights now:

• Mike's Sky Rancho - arriving at 5:30 pm on Christmas eve.
• Making Hanukkah candles out of tecate bottle caps, matches and Jesus candle wax
• Driving the Baja 1000 and 500 roads
• A meeting with 3 federales in the chaparral on Xmas day
• Baja breakfast: beer and baklava
• San Felipe  all night Xmas karaoke
• The Parque National Constution 1851 - pine trees surround a lake at 5000+ elevation
• Coca-cola light
• Licking the truck wounds back to LA

We returned to LA unscathed; my Spanish brushed up a bit, the truck more worn for the wear with a notebook of dreams and plans for adventures in 2006.

Day 21

It's day 21 on the no coffee in the future. Last week was difficult and I won't pretend that I can't wait until January 1st. But I'm proud of myself for having made it this far without more temptations.

Santa's toolbelt

The tire pressure gage didn't come in handy afterall.

All I want for Christmas is...

another laser gun. Check out the photos of my laser gun collection. Here are some videos of me playing with my guns.

• My favorite gun running out of juice
• Small green Gun
• Dinosaur spark gun
• The sword that thinks it's a gun
• Aeon's First Gun

Where can I find more laser guns?!!! Do you want more Vblogging?

Seven daggers and a sword

2005 is rapidly closing shop. And it's almost time to do the final review of my 2005 goals. This has been the year of the spider. Weaving a web, sitting silently, waiting patiently. And I have been waiting, but not so patiently. 2006 is already looking to be quite different. First off, I'm not going to be making the standard goal list I have in previous years. I plan to still manage my goals, but I've found that a yearly cycle is too long as I manifest and execute on my goals in 3-6 months time. So the goals are going on a quarterly review cycle along with some bigger longer term goals.

Instead, as I prepare to move into 2006, I've been thinking about what I want to take from 2005 (and all previous years) with me into 2006. I've distilled what I'm taking with me to seven daggers and a sword.

• Courage
• Vision
• Limitation
• Goals
• Faith
• Passion
• Reckless
• Love

These are my tools.

I'm leaving 2006 open - a void - an unknown for something interesting to manifest. Something so exciting I can't even think or plan it. I like surprises. I want to see what kind of surprise the universe throws my way.

Almost Forgotten Award

I was preparing for an event when I came across this award given to me at Burning Man. If you can't read the writing in the photo, it reads: Heathervescent, "Award 4 making BIG ASS FIRE". This in response to piling an entire stack of free wood into the Van-B-Que, I think.

Nothing is free

You pay in your time, energy, attention or money. Nothing is ever freely given, except maybe love. And even that is often given with the expectation of something in return.

What do you think?

knowing the grid

I'm in West Hollywood again. I just can't seem to get away from this part of town - which I am coming to love more and more. So much for the future, G. But I think you knew S would eventually win - even before we knew him.

Early on in my LA wanderings I got to know the general grid of the city. I was doing the Santa Monica/Venice to Mt Washington hike on city streets attempting to avoid 10 traffic. These days I don't make it out to the Ocean that much anymore. I don't miss my Malibu mudslides, or tearing up Piuma canyon. I don't miss my morning commute up Hwy 1, coffee in cup holder, top down, wind in my hair. However, I do miss swinging near the Santa Monica Pier.

The Santa Monica swings are the best swings ever. So tall. I would pump my legs back and forth until the seat reached the level of the top bar, lean back, head upside-down as the world came rushing up and then receded as I sucked in air. Up and down. Over and over. I would often come upon the swings deserted. My choice of 6 golden seats. Which would I pick? And often, as I finally jumped away from the swing (in mid-air of course) all other seats would be taken.

I tried to give advice to a couple of German girls once on how to swing their legs to get more lift. (There is a technique for more lift. I learned it when I studied flying trapeze.) I alternated between working for more height, speed and enjoying the ride. I loved those swings. It's almost a reason for the trip West.

But I didn't plan to write about my love for the Santa Monica swings. I was writing about the grid. I've learned the larger grid of the city - main street thorough-fares and even a couple sneak-arounds. Twisty roads, speedy secondary arteries. Walking around the neighborhood with the dog or taking the evening stroll, taught me about my immediate local blocks. All these are data point in the grid of my mind. Pathways, directions, options when I may need them. I like to mix things up and keep them fresh, so when walking or driving, I like to try new routes.

Today I as I headed over to my appointment I thought of the many possibly routes that would lead me to my destination. City street, 5 different freeway exits. Which one did I prefer? Which one would I take? I'm speeding down the 101, window open, blowing my hair thinking about my next move. Usually I take the most direct, fast or efficient route that is the most pleasing for driving, my clutch or my eye. Today my eye was on Hollywood, so I drove down the Boulevard. I passed the stores I always pass (usually going the other direction). Enjoying the view, the music. I passed the Egyptian Theater. I though of all the companies I've almost worked for in LA. The conversations I've had. My dreams, desires, intentions. Of dreams coming true on this very street - filled with stars. It's an inspiring drive.

These streets in Los Angeles have,  do and will lead me to my dreams. I can choose the route, streets I may want to take. Which view I want to feast my eyes as I move closer and closer and navigate and explore the grid.

Don't be shy

Hi. I know you're there. Reading my blog, this post, right now. Maybe in a RSS feed reader, maybe on the site. Just like you, I'm a regular human being. I like to get feeback. What do you think of the site? All you new LA Times readers. I've heard from some of you (thank you) but others are quiet. That's ok. But you don't have to be shy. Send me a message if you like. Or a link or a blog or an interesting story about LA or your dream life.

no coffee in the future

On December 1st, Gloria and I made a decision to give up coffee until the end of the year. We are both java addicts, G being Italian and me a child of the tech start-up world. I'm the keeper of the espresso machine in the house and Gloria is a big fan of coffee to start the day. Previous to December first we'd wake up to a pot and often I'd make macchiatos, mochas or cappuccino's for the afternoon, sometimes in addition to an afternoon cup o joe.

So here we are, on day 12, with no coffee flowing through these veins of mine. And that's just fine.

I've switched to tea, chai, hot chocolate (although not so good for the ivory skin). And I realized that there are a wide variety of beverages available that I previously discounted, granted getting hooked on Diet Coke may not be much better than coffee.

I don't know if come Jan 1st I'll dip my nose into a steamy cup of joe, half and half swirling and blending into the chocolate colored elixur. Or will I be content without it in my life? Time will tell. I do know that my next beverage challenge will be to only drink water...

Morcheeba reminder

"I know I can
be what I wanna be
if I work hard at it
I'll be where I wanna be"

If you want a copy of "Get Mashed" the Morcheeba Mashup CD, drop me an email with your mailing address.

Heathervescent's Wall of Sound

I'm back on Theory Radio tonight from 8 to 11pm pacific darkness time. Tune into my effervescent show via WinAmp, iTunes or your other Audio Internet enabled player via this direct stream broadcast link now.

lifehacking

It's not new to me or even a lot of people, but I'm on the GTD train now. Watch out world, cause 2006 is right around the corner and I'm implementing the new and improved method for me to execute on my dreams. That's right, more dreams actualized faster. Watch and see.

a year ago (not blogged)

I don't write everything in my life on this blog. So here's an anniversary that was not documented. One year ago I found the future. It was a day like today. I walked into what would be my living room. There was a dog jumping around in the yard. Kids in the bedrooms. The red and yellow walls beckoned me along with the warm tile and the terraced garden. I could see myself living here. And now I do.

In this year, we've changed the future. We've added a lot more color, some sparkle. Done a lot of raking, yard cleaning. Replaced appliances, fixed leaks, dealt with flying friends and neighborhood dogs. We've since explored the "canyon", passed the murder scene regularly and taken in many views from three stumps. I've created new ideas, redefined myself, gone through a few relationships and continue to challenge and be challenged in everything I do.

This morning I went to Venice Beach. The weather was gorgeous, the sky blue, sun high, breeze light. I didn't care. The air was fresh, but I couldn't wait to get back to the future. I stood on the beach and looked north to Malibu and remembered my daily commute. The twisty roads, the mud slides. And I think of further northern location. And my current commute. And as the year winds down, I start to review my 2005 goals and think about what I want to accomplish in 2006.

And what do I want the future to bring? And what do I want to bring to the future?

raking leaves perfectly

I'm raking leaves again. It's not because I want to. It needs to be done and I need to get out of my head and do some physical labor. That doesn't stop my brain from thinking about perfection and failure. I want to be a perfectionist. I want everything in the world to be as I envision it - that's my perfection. But then again, I want to be surprised, I want there to be new and exciting things that I can't even imagine. So why should I get frusterated when I know the instant I come in and take a shower after raking, that the beautiful straight lines in the dirt will have yellow leaves across them, like a music signature. I create the blank lines for the trees to write the music on. (However a few moments ago, I didn't think of it like that - they were just more leaves to rake.) I don't want to be a specialist - a genius in one or two things. I want to kick ass in EVERYTHING I do. I know that's a hard thing to accomplish, but that's the point. (The journey is the destination, blah blah blah.) And I do generally do better than average in most things I do. So why is that not good enough for me? Where is the satisfaction, the contentment? Maybe all these thoughts are in my head because this is the second day without coffee. It's like leaving the house without my wallet, cellphone or keys.

On winning

"The battle is won in the homework. In the field, it is just actualizing what you put into your mind."
- Barbara Warren, last night at Borders

West Hollywood to the Future via Sunset

I'm doing my almost regular morning commute - becoming more and more regular as I continue to be stolen from the future. Today I had to return early in time for breakfast so I didn't jump on the 101. Instead I stayed on Sunset Blvd. and drove the entire stretch to the 2. I love Sunset. The few blocks through Hollywood were not as bright and twinkling because of the overcast sky. But I looked at the stars on the street signs and the sidewalk. I passed the Egyptian Theater, stripper stores, the Pantages and a big crowd of people lined up near some barricades nearby. I passed through the newly developed Western/Sunset block with the Metro and shopping center. Then skirted the edge of Los Feliz, through Silverlake and into Echo Park.

I was musing about living in LA and my recent cover photo and inclusion in the blogging article in the LA Times (Calendar). And how yesterday was such a day of ups and downs. It was a corkscrew roller coaster ride with Mom in town, the LA Times thing, training I had prepared for my company that had to be rescheduled at the last minute, Gloria's fabulous book signing and giving up coffee until the end of the year. And cramming in as much Sam as is possible.

Today I normalize. Try to get back to baseline, whatever that is. Baseline seems to be moving constantly these days, it's not much like a baseline. Wait a minute, that's a lie. I'm not trying to normalize at all. What I'm really trying to do is get used to my life. Get used to this extremely interesting life I have manifested. get used to the moving baseline. Sometimes it's so much like a dream, I forget it is real.

To LA Times Readers

Well, hello there.

Thanks for stopping by. Stay a bit, peruse the archives. Feel free to post a comment or send me an email. And be sure to check out other blogs in the blogosphere. Enjoy your city and dream big.

Read the entire post that was excerpted in the LA Times article.

Zinging Stories

I picked mom up at the airport yesterday as she came into town for Gloria's book signing party tonight. We kicked around the hood and then headed home. She brought with her a huge suitcase of stuff from my past. She's cleaning out her house in preparation to moving to Portland soon. In the big black suitcase, were some really classic finds. Like my Halloween costume from 1975, when I was 1 1/2. I put it on and could still wear it! (It's a little red riding hood hood.) Stuffed animals from when I had the typical unicorn obsession. But the best, most fabulous surprise from the suitcase was my baton.

I saw the sparkling edge poking out from behind the packing material and I snatched it up, immediately ignoring everything else in the room. The metal rod flipped and twisted through my fingers. Kinetically remembering threading the tube through my finders. Thumb-tosses. Wrist flips. Your standard horizontal twirling. I could not stop. My body could not stop.

Later we went to dinner where mom got to meet the love. At Electric Lotus we had a great spread of spicy dishes. As the eating winded down, mom pulled out the personal stories. Your parents always have them. The story of breaking my brother's arm, of being a strong willed child, favorite restaurants (Indian and Thai), words of wisdom. I'm sitting between my mom and Sam, cringing, wondering, if he'll still love me after or in spite of those stories. Stories that show parts of my personality that few have experienced. (Ahhh, family.)

Still though, these stories of myself, the ones I can't quite remember, but my mother can, are a boon to me. The show my true colors, on some level, that I myself maybe could not see. I've matured many of these characteristics, shaped them into who I am today. But it's good to see what the seeds were and where they were laid down.